Friday, November 20, 2009

Sweepstakes Winner Gibberish

“I won a car!” – Dan Sadleir
“I won $100,000!” – Martha Redding
“I won a vacation!” – Sue Dreyfus

These are three of the many various quotes posted in Subway stores right now to promote some sweepstakes they’re doing. They also serve as a reminder to me that if I ever win a Subway sweepstakes, to speak only gibberish for several weeks so that my sticker will say:

“Nestle here farm apes!” – Greg Wendling
...or...
“Punch it here!” – Greg Wendling
...or...
“Fish have lasers!” – Greg Wendling
...or...
“Carlos hairplug fire squirt!” – Greg Wendling

While it's the least nonsensical, “Punch it here!” may be my favorite, because in addition to it having nothing to do with the sweepstakes, my quote (like all the others) will be a stick-on decal they put on the sneeze guard for customers to see as they stand in line. "Punch it here!" would encourage people to punch the glass, which could only have delightful consequences.

What would your quote say?

4 comments:

Chris Othic said...

I don't know what my quote would say, but you have somehow put the fun back into trips to Subway. They were getting rather boring and pedestrian.

Nat Topping said...

"This fixes nothing." -Nat Topping

Gamer18548 said...

"I wear eggs!" - Gamer18548

Mike Bauman said...

"Hysterectomy." - Mike Bauman