Thursday, October 13, 2011

Natural Gas Company Propoganda is BULLS*!T!

Julianna Forlano is funny. And smart. And ironic. And here is her latest, and most maddening, Ironic News Report yet.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

It's Funny

It's funny that I am the first person to post a blog since April. You probably don't know why it's funny, but I do. That is why inside jokes work very well in sketch and improv comedy. Here is a photo that came up when I typed "water bomb mallery" into google:

Feel free to make up a story as to why those words and that picture are connected as you drift off to sleep tonight.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

St Drunken, Debriefed!

Well, St. Drunken's Day was last Saturday and we're just now getting over the hangover.  Personally, I couldn't remember completely what all happened.  Luckily, Greg's friend Laura Shin had a camera and took pictures!  So let's take a look through here and see if we can remember what the hell happened:
Yeah, this was the pageant.  I remember that happening at some point.  I think we were all only three beers or so down by that point.  This is either a picture of St. Drunken praying to the Lord for guidance, or else Greg is about to put some sort of crazy flying wrestling move on Geoff, with the help of Susie and Joe.  It's probably a wrestling move.
It's okay, though, because Greg and Geoff obviously made up.
Here's us playing the St. Drunken's Day traditional song.  Note the excessive amount of guitars on stage.  And yes, that would be Chris holding the lyrics for Greg.  Because we are professionals, damn it.  Also, please note in the background that Joe is playing the 'stairs.'  This is considered a legitimate instrument during St. Drunken's Day festivities.

Here's Chris teaching everybody how to read.  It was the educational portion of the show, and I think everybody was touched.  Meaning, of course, that Chris made it a point to physically touch everyone.  This would be a great group photo if I was in this, but I'm not.  And where was I?

Hanging out with my doppelganger, that's where.  It's not often that you go through your wardrobe specifically to find the weirdest shirt you own, only to find someone else wearing the exact same shirt.  Once I got over the inexplicable shame and embarassment of that, I went over and introduced myself.  His name's Jeremy and he's awesome.  Look!  We're buddies.

So what the hell else happened?

Beer Pong, apparently.  Susie was so zoned in that she became blurry.


Beer drinking (That's the photographer taking a break).  OH!  And this guy!

That guy parked himself by the Plinko board that I made for the party and basically ran the damn thing for an hour and a half.  It was like having Bob Barker show up to your event and just start running your drinking games.  It was great.  No idea who this guy was, but hats off to you!

All in all, it was a successful night and a hell of a lot of fun.  Thanks to the guys at the loft for all of their help with putting everything on; thanks to Laura for showing up with a camera and documenting everything for us; and most of all, thanks to everyone who showed up to celebrate this little holiday with us.

Look at you guys.  You're beautiful.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

RvD Fundraiser - It's St. Drunken's Day!

Robot vs. Dinosaur invites you to attend a fundraiser celebrating: St. Drunken’s Day! A Holiday for the Drunken Masses

The event will feature the first-ever St. Drunken’s Day pageant, drinking games, drinking songs, a raffle for fun drinking (and non-drinking) related prizes, a silent auction of one-of-a-kind St. Drunken’s Day artwork and a host of other fun activities including a goodly amount of a certain beverage made from hops and barley.

The Details:

What: St. Drunken’s Day Celebration When: Saturday, April 16, 2011 from 7 p.m. to 10 p.m. Where: 3036 North Lincoln Avenue, #2 Tickets: $20 in advance, $25 at the door (this event is capped so purchase your tickets early--don’t get left out of the celebration!)

To purchase tickets see any member of RvD.

You must be 21 to attend St. Drunken’s Day.

About St. Drunken: St. Drunken is the world’s mostly forgotten patron saint of drunks, inebriates, drinkers, imbibers and people who like to have fun. He is responsible for finding arbitrary reasons for people to get together, enjoy each other’s company, shake off the weight of the world, and drink alcohol (usually to excess).

All proceeds will go to help fund future RvD shows, not to buy beer for RvD. Mostly.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Muffin Tops

Did you know that "Muffin Top" was recently added to the Oxford English Dictionary? Well, it was.

"2. a protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers."

And while it may have taken Oxford University until 2011 to appreciate the phenomenon, our friends at Creepy Hug have been celebrating Muffin Tops for years. This video is from Chicago Sketchfest 2009, and it also reveals Creepy Hug took notice of Charlie Sheen long before his recent press. They were about 25 years late on Rainbow Bright, however. Enjoy.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Happy Pulaski Day!

Our friends at *Creepy Hug, and the Peanuts gang, help explain what this holiday is all about.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011


Swiped and reposted for maximum laziness:

WBEZ Dueling Critics Kelly Kleiman and Jonathan Arbarbanel will take the audience through memorable moments in Chicago’s rich theater history along with a panel of experts. Stitching the evening together, five local theater companies will perform a few of these moments with tongues firmly in cheeks.

To attend you must purchase tickets at

On stage:

...- Kelly Kleiman is a freelance writer on the arts, feminism, travel and social justice.
- Jonathan Abarbanel is theater critic for WBEZ and the weekly Windy City Times newspaper.


Critic Albert Williams, Broadway actor Kate Buddeke, and Victory Gardens' founder Dennis Zacek


Sketch comedy group Robot vs. Dinosaur, spoken word troupe BoyGirlBoyGirl, fringe theater companies The Plagiarists and RoShamBo Theater, and southside educational theater company Tofu Chitlin' Circuit


$15/general admission
$12/WBEZ members
$10/students (with valid ID)

More information:

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Just Need Some Space...?

This is awkward. I got this e-mail this morning.

Hey Joe,
We've missed you at Myspace lately. Plain and simple, we think you should come back. And here's why.
The new Myspace provides the best social entertainment experience on Earth.
You can now follow your favorite topics in music, movies, celebs, and TV and get instant updates from around the web.
The new Myspace gives you custom recommendations so you can discover more of what you love and connect with new like-minded friends.


I have been working on my response.

Hey, MySpace,

Good to hear from you. Sounds like you are doing well, which is great. Very happy to hear that. Sorry I haven't seen you in so long. Seems like years! Where does the time go? Thanks for the link. I actually lost your url. Got a new computer, didn't have my old bookmarks or passwords, etc, you know how it goes.

I appreciate the invite to come back, but I have to be honest here. The reason I haven't been visiting you is because I have been seeing someone else. For a few years now. And, yes, if you do the math, I was seeing them while still seeing you. I feel like a real heel and I never meant to hurt you. They were just very persistent and eventually won me over. What can I say? Social media can be so fickle, right?

Well, I wouldn't be surprised if you never wanted to hear or see from me, again. But, if you're up for it, I wouldn't mind getting together for coffee and chatting about old times. When you're ready. Tell Tom I said hello. I always thought he was nice.

- Joe

P.S. Oh, hey. Have you ever heard of Friendster? You two should meet and hang out. I think you have a lot to talk about.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011


On the off chance that anyone still reads this thing and wants to know what RvD is up to in the new year, here are a couple of projects we're woring on:

  1. Writing and performing a piece for WBEZ's Alternative History of Chicago Theatre (Abridged) on Wednesday, March 2nd.
  2. An eBook version of our first show, The Greatest Stories Never Told... Told!
  3. A fundraiser evening called "St. Drunken's Day."
  4. Our as yet untitled Spring/Summer show about mutant animal sketch comedy performers in futuristic Nazi Illinois.
  5. Cake for everyone!
So, we have that to look forward to.  Hope to see some of you people out at one or all of these.

Monday, January 24, 2011

I Saw Social Network! In Other News, Oh God The Hindenburg!

My name is Nat Topping, and I am the last person to see Social Network.

I am now in an awkward position, which is this: after seeing a movie like Social Network, I would normally like to run out and talk about it with other people.  But since everyone has seen the movie already, I would just be opening myself up to criticism.

'Really?  You're just now talking about Social Network?  That movie has been out for like half a year, hasn't it?'

Yes, it's been out since October.  But I didn't have a chance to see it in October and now I have and doesn't anyone else want to talk about it?  I promise I'll have witty and interesting things to say about it!  Honest, I will!

But no, nobody wants to talk about Social Network.  Because everyone on the planet has already had their Social Network discussion moments.  Everyone's already debated whether or not Mark Zuckerberg is a douchebag.  Everyone's already questioned whether Justin Timberlake did a good job as Sean Parker because he's suddenly a good actor or because he himself is also a douchebag.  Everyone's already posted their Facebook "I'm watching Social Network while posting on Facebook" wall posts.

It would be like me running up to people and saying "Hey, have you kids seen that new Annie Hall movie?  Boy howdie, that Woody Allen sure knows how to write!"

Just saw that new Citizen Kane movie and it was amazing.  Everybody rush out to your nearest movie house!  It's worth the 50 cent price of admission, and if you stay after you can check out one of them new Looney Toons!

To sum up, I suck.

But at least I wrote a blog post today.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011


Let the New Year’s pluggery commence!

Next Friday, January 14th at 7:00 PM, your favorite Chicago sketch comedy group named Robot vs Dinosaur PERFORMS at Chicago Sketchfest!

Come spend an hour with us as we relive our short lived glory sketches in an ‘unplugged’ environment. There will be sketches and songs and even a staged reading of something too inappropriate to be staged. And as always the show ends catastrophically.

See? Unplugged! Like Aerosmith!

1225 W Belmont Ave
Chicago, IL 60657

Robot vs Dinosaur
Friday, 1/14 @ 7:00 PM
South Theatre

For more information and ticketing, go to