May 3, 2003 - Makes pumpkin muffins with walnuts. His sister hates nuts.
August 29, 1989 - Sorta laughs at an Andrew Dice Clay routine.
October 17, 1976 - Rips his mother's vagina to bits being born with that big old head of his.
June 12, 2008 - Opens his one-man show, "Hysterectomies Should Be Mandatory."
April 2, 6417 BC - Gives Eve an apple.
For these egregious acts, Robot vs Dinosaur has had Mike Bauman castrated. Here is a photograph taken at the moment of the snip.
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And to Think That I Penilectomy It on Mulberry Street
The Penilectomy Hats of Batholomew Cubbins
The King's Penilectomy
The Seven Penilectomy Godivas
Horton Hatches the Penilectomy
McElligot's Penilectomy
Thidwick the Big-Hearted Penilectomy
Scrambled Eggs Penilectomy!
Horton Hears a Penilectomy
How the Penilectomy Stole Christmas
The Cat in the Penilectomy
One Penilectomy Two Penilectomy Red Penilectomy Blue Penilectomy
Green Eggs and Ham
Penilectomy on Pop
Penilectomy in Socks
I Can Penilectomy 30 Tigers Today! and Other Stories
There's a Penilectomy in My Pocket
I Can Penilectomy With My Eyes Shut
Oh, the Places You'll Penilectomy!
Thank you,
Mike Bauman
4 comments:
Let the buyer beware, Mike Bauman.
This is only fitting. As it says in the Bible, "A hysterectomy for an eye, a penilectomy for a tooth."
Wow. Somehow, penilectomy is not as funny. Does that make me an awful person?
Or was I an awful person already and this just proves it?
Nat, you don't think a penilectomy is funny because you would have to suffer through two of them.
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