Friday, July 30, 2010

Whooping Cough - Not Quite As Awesome As It Sounds

Take it from me. I have it. Or at least I probably have it. I was told on Tuesday by my doctor that my symptoms are classic. Don't worry, you can't catch it from me at this point. I'm no longer contagious, I'm just carrying around the symptoms. They're really annoying.

Symptoms include:
  • Sporadic coughing fits
  • Difficulty breathing after coughing, sometimes resulting in "whooping" sound
  • Extreme cases may result in vomiting and appearance of 1860's top hat on head in men, or full-skirted hoop dresses in women
The immunization for this disease, was developed in 1920 at Evanston Hospital in Chicago, IL. Unfortunately it only lasts a few years, but that makes it effective enough to get you through childhood, which is when this affliction is most dangerous.

As literally every single one of you know, I collect diseases from times gone by. I've already had:
  • Whooping cough
  • Catarrh
  • The Oh-My-Lordies
Next up on my list to get:
  • Hot Mess (Trannygraphis Runwayata)
  • The Ague
  • The Consumption
  • The Vapors


Anonymous said...

Perhaps this would explain that Darth Vader "whooping" video you posted for us a while back. Way to go, GW. Catching a whoop from an Intergalactic Ugly. Typical.

Anonymous said...

Does this explain why you showed up in a dress in your last performance?